Gluten For Punishment by Julie Seyler

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A 5-star Goodreads review featuring a quote praising 'Gluten for Punishment,' a memoir by Julie Seyler that combines personal experiences with dessert recipes. The review highlights the relatable themes of love and relationships, along with the appeal of easy, delicious recipes.
Gluten for Punishment: Just Desserts for the Heartbroken, Lovesick, and Jilted by author,
Julie Seyler

Gluten for Punishment now available!
Gluten for Punishment: Just Desserts for the Heartbroken, Lovesick, and Jilted is a wry, heartfelt memoir by baking blogger and writer Julie Seyler, filled with personal stories, dating misadventures, and the desserts that got her through it all…

Julie Seyler’s love life has been a recipe for disaster—and she has the baked goods to prove it.

In this humorous and heartfelt collection, beloved baking blogger Julie Seyler shares stories of love, loss, and everything in between—accompanied by her signature dessert recipes—in one irresistible, gluten-filled volume.

Whether she’s arriving home after an awkward first date or seeking comfort once a promising relationship goes up in flames, Julie knows exactly where to turn when things go awry: the kitchen. And after three decades spent dating a cast of brooding, complicated Gen X creatives, her recipe box is overflowing—even while her bed remains empty.

From frustrating flings with the emotionally unavailable to an unflinching exploration of the love that lingers after tragedy, Gluten for Punishment is a wry and honest reminder that while relationships are rarely predictable, a sweet ending always awaits in the kitchen.

More praise:

“This brave and intimate memoir reveals that the recipe for lasting love lies in self-love and resilience.”

“I devoured this book. Intoxicated like a child after trick-or-treating, shoveling down candy as if each piece might vanish.”

Almond-Filled New Orleans King Cake

New Orleans style King Cake with Almond filling.

Today’s Musings:

Happy Fat Tuesday, Mes Chers!

There were a bunch of unforgettable moments during my culinary school days – executing live lobsters, boning an entire leg of lamb, deveining fresh foie gras, and my very first triumph with butter-block puff pastry. One of the desserts we made with that puff was a buttery, flaky Galette des Rois (aka French King Cake) filled with rich almond crème – no frozen puff pastry shortcuts, no tubes of almond paste. The flavor of that galette still haunts my dreams. We crafted each one painstakingly, and you could taste the love in every bite.

But when someone says “King Cake,” my mind jumps to the early 2000s, back when I worked for a New Orleans-based energy company. Around Mardi Gras, my co-worker Mike – who had spent years living in New Orleans – would have New Orleans King Cakes overnighted straight to our office in Irvine, California.

If Galette des Rois is refined Parisian patisserie, this version is pure Bourbon Street. These celebratory rings are garishly decorated in green, purple, and gold, flavored with cinnamon, and more like a yeasted breakfast bread than puff pastry. Their arrival around Fat Tuesday would spark a full-on office celebration, usually accompanied by a Crockpot of Mike’s famous jambalaya.

This year, I decided to try my hand at a New Orleans-style King Cake…with a filling that’s a little nod to my beloved Galette des Rois: Almond.

And the baby?
Don’t be surprised if you bite into a tiny plastic one. It’s all about luck and prosperity – whoever finds the baby is “king” or “queen” for the day. But don’t get too excited: that person also has to bring the cake to the next party. In our cheapskate office, coworkers would carefully strategize their slice cuts to avoid the baby entirely.

And those colors?
Traditional Mardi Gras green, gold, and purple. If you’ve never seen a king cake, you might think it was decorated by a color-blind 4-year-old. Just tell yourself that the wild explosion of color is “festive,” even if it looks like it survived a paintball fight.

Today’s Recipe:

Almond-Filled New Orleans King Cake

This New Orleans–style king cake features a soft, pillowy dough wrapped around a rich almond filling that’s lightly sweet with a hint of orange. Brushed with butter and finished with a simple sugar glaze and festive purple, green, and gold sugar, it’s a flavorful twist on the traditional Mardi Gras treat.


Ingredients

    DOUGH
  • 3 cups all-purpose flour
  • 2 tablespoons granulated sugar
  • 1 packet(2 ¼ teaspoons) instant yeast
  • 1 stick (½ cup) unsalted butter, room temperature
  • ½ cup half & half
  • 2 large eggs, lightly beaten
  • ½ teaspoon kosher salt
  • ALMOND FILLING
  • 3 tablespoons unsalted butter, room temperature
  • 2 cups almond flour, lightly toasted in a skillet and cooled
  • 1 cup powdered sugar
  • 1 large egg white
  • 2 teaspoon almond extract
  • ½ teaspoon orange zest
  • ¼ teaspoon kosher salt
  • DECORATION
  • 2 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
  • 1 plastic baby or uncooked bean
  • 2 cups powdered sugar, sifted
  • 2 tablespoons milk
  • Purple, green, and gold colored sugar

Directions

  1. Using paddle attachment, combine all dough ingredients to form a shaggy dough. Switch to dough hook and begin kneading dough on low speed. Increase to medium and continue kneading dough until it comes together in a ball and feels smooth and elastic, 9-11 minutes. Transfer dough to an oiled bowl, cover and let proof in a warm place until doubled in size, about 1 hour.
  2. Meanwhile, using paddle attachment, stir filling ingredients in bowl until the ingredients come together. Roll almond paste in plastic wrap so it doesn’t dry out. Set aside.
  3. Transfer dough onto a lightly floured work surface. Pat into a rough rectangular shape, then, with a rolling pin, roll dough into a rectangle 16 inches wide by 12 inches tall. Spread filling in a thin layer over dough, leaving a ½-inch border at the top of rectangle. Using rolling pin, lightly roll filling into dough so that it sticks. Starting at long end closest to you, roll dough into a log. Do not roll too tight, allowing yeast room to expand during the second proof. If dough sticks to the floured surface, use a pastry scraper to help roll dough. Pinch the log of dough closed at the seam. Seam side down, stretch log to 18 inches and shape log into a ring, cut off jagged ends, and pinch the dough together where the ends meet to form a seal. (Tip: roll a piece of jagged end super thin and patch area where the ends meet like a bandage. The patch will be covered with icing). Transfer the ring to a parchment-lined baking sheet and cover. Let ring proof until doubled in size, about 1 hour.
  4. Preheat oven to 350°F. Bake about 25-35 minutes until golden and internal temperature reaches 190°F. Tent with foil if browning too quickly. Remove from oven, brush with melted butter, let cool for 10-minutes on the baking sheet, and then transfer to a wire rack. After 30 minutes, loosely cover with a clean, dry towel to keep king cake soft. Let cool to room temperature.
  5. If using a plastic baby or bean, gently push it into the underside of cake so that it’s hidden. Place the powdered sugar and milk in a small bowl and whisk together to create a thick, but pourable, icing. Add a little more milk if needed. Drizzle frosting over the cake and sprinkle colored sugar in patches. Let the icing dry completely before serving.

No-Bake Chai Tart with Cherry Gelée

A round tart with a glossy red filling topped with white chocolate circular decorations, set on a black surface.

Today’s Recipe:

“Scattered Energies Leads to Unfulfilled Potential.” That’s a tarot reading I received more than twenty years ago. It’s the only one I still remember—and for good reason. I whisper that reminder to myself daily, with my scattered energies flying about in all directs, often feeling like a Jill of all trades, master of one, maybe two at best.

I began developing this recipe last October, when I was sans oven, then promptly forgot about it, distracted by other bakes and more pressing writing projects. Recently, I was showing friends photos of my creations, and this dessert was the shot that drew the “Ohs” of excitement. So, I decided to dust off the recipe and finally bring this dessert to life…just one of fifty-five potential recipes still waiting in the wings.

No-Bake Chai Tart with Cherry Gelée

  • Servings: One 9-inch tart
  • Print

A silky, luxuriously chai filling is perfectly complemented by a jewel-toned tart cherry gelée, lightly spiced with cloves. Each bite offers a delicate balance of rich sweetness, subtle spice, and bright, tart cherry.


Ingredients

    **CRUST**
  • 10 oz. package shortbread cookies, such as Lorna Doone
  • ½ cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, melted and cooled
  • ¼ teaspoon kosher salt
  • **CHAI FILLING**
  • ½ cup whole milk
  • 3 chai tea bags
  • 2 teaspoons (scant) powdered gelatin
  • 2 tablespoons cold water
  • 8 ounces white chocolate, chopped (not morsels)
  • 1 cup heavy whipping cream, cold
  • **CHERRY GELÉE**
  • ½ teaspoon (rounded) powdered gelatin
  • 1 tablespoon cold water
  • ½ cup tart cherry juice (unsweetened)
  • 2 tablespoons sugar
  • 2-3 whole cloves

Directions

  1. Make crust: In a food processor, process cookies into crumbs; add melted butter and salt. Press into the bottom and up the sides of a 9-inch tart pan, thicker on the sides and thinner at the bottom. Place crust in freezer to set.
  2. Make filling: Heat milk until just steaming. Remove from heat and add chai tea bags. Cover and steep 10-15 minutes. It should be strong but not bitter. Remove tea bags.
  3. While milk is steeping, sprinkle gelatin over cold water in a small bowl. Let bloom for 5–10 minutes. Place chopped white chocolate in a medium bowl and set aside. Stir the bloomed gelatin into the hot milk until fully dissolved. Pour hot milk mixture over the chocolate. Let sit 30 seconds, then whisk gently until smooth. If chocolate does not fully melt, place in microwave for 10-20 seconds and whisk until smooth. Stir in cold heavy whipping cream slowly to preserve the emulsion. Pour into tart shell. The filling will be liquid; for easier pouring, place the tart shell in the refrigerator and pour the filling directly into the shell. Cover and refrigerate at least 3 hours, preferably overnight, until firm.
  4. Make Gelée: Once filling is firm, bloom gelatin in cold water for 5 minutes. Warm cherry juice, sugar, and cloves in a small saucepan until sugar dissolves. Remove from heat and stir in bloomed gelatin until dissolved. Let cool until just barely warm, remove cloves, then pour over chilled filling. Chill at least 3 hours until set.

Two-Bit News:

Big news, friends! Gluten for Punishment has officially made its way onto the shelves of Jody Savage’s online indie-author bookstore—your one-stop spot for the best indie reads: Take a peek here

But wait, there’s more… I’m also now part of the wonderful world of Moonstone & Mist, a cozy pop-up and online bookstore that champions indie authors and community in Redondo Beach (and beyond!). Your next favorite read is just a click away: Explore Moonstone & Mist

And stay tuned! I’ll soon be joining Uncle Jimmy’s Podcast, a weekly show where host Jimmy Leary sits down with real people (that’s me!) for honest, unscripted conversations (that’s my life!). You can catch it on all major platforms—like Apple Podcasts. I’ll send the details and episode link as soon as it drops — you won’t want to miss it.