Category Archives: Dessert

My Favorite Apple Crumble

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An apple crumble with a corner eaten out.

TODAY’S MUSINGS:
I bake constantly, yet rarely do my bakes make it to this blog. I bake because I’m craving cookies at 11 p.m. I bake when I’m invited to a potluck. I bake to repurpose leftovers (duck breast pot pie, anyone?). I bake to add recipes to my long-overdue and upcoming cookbook. I bake to recipe test and test and test.

This dessert wasn’t originally slotted for this blog (so forgive the janky photo). A friend gave me five pounds of homegrown apples and most of them ended up in my belly unadulterated and “as is,” but there remained two pounds of apples that were extra tart – too tart even for a Two-bit Tart. I decided to make an apple crumble, a delicious and easy-peasy recipe for using up a surplus of apples with ingredients on hand.

The day prior,  my sister had visited to help  decorate the tree and, along with her,  she brought a bottle of Shanky’s Whip® whisky for us to sample, because, truly, what goes better with handling fragile glass ornaments on teeny-tiny hooks than copious amounts of alcohol? (Only one ornament was harmed during this endeavor). Since both of us bake, we began discussing the addition of Shanky’s Whip® in various desserts potentially improved with a slug of vanilla-caramel flavored booze.

So,  here I am baking up a quick apple crumble with a bottle of Shanky’s Whip® watching me from the kitchen counter – it seemed like the ideal time to test our dessert musings. I’ve been making apple crumbles and apple crisps since jr. high school. By far, this version was the best apple crumble I’ve ever eaten. So much so that, when I went to cut a large square to bring to my friend,  I realized there wasn’t a large square left – I had demolished ⅔ of the tray!

What made this version so special? It could be the homegrown, tart, ideal-for-baking apples; It might be the Shanky’s Whip®; further taste-testing is required for a definitive determination. In the meantime, try making your own version and let me know what you think

TODAY’S RECIPE:
You’d think this is a paid promo by Shanky’s Whip® Whiskey, but it’s not. My sister bought a bottle for the holidays and, after sampling a few glasses, both of us knew the warm caramel and vanilla notes would complement most cold-weather baked goods – We weren’t wrong.

An Apple Crumble before baking with a bottle of Shanky's Whip in the back

Apple Crumble

I’ve made more than my share of apple crisps and crumbles and this version tops the charts – tart apples, crunchy crumble, and plenty of warming cinnamon and vanilla. I prefer to peel my apples, but if you don’t mind apple peels in your dessert, feel free to leave them on.


Ingredients

    Crumble Topping
  • 1 cup all-purpose flour
  • ½ cup light brown sugar
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • ¾ teaspoon cinnamon
  • ½ teaspoon Kosher salt
  • 1 stick (½ cup) unsalted butter, melted and slightly cooled
    • Apple Filling
  • 2-2 ½ lbs. tart apples, peeled (if desired) and roughly chopped
  • ¼ cup granulated sugar
  • 1 Tablespoon cornstarch
  • 2 Tablespoons Shanky’s Whip Whisky® or 2 Tablespoons Brandy and 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • ½ teaspoon cinnamon
  • ¼ teaspoon Kosher salt

Directions

  1. Preheat oven to 350°F. Lightly grease an 8” square baking dish. In a medium bowl, combine all-purpose flour, light brown sugar, baking powder, cinnamon, and Kosher salt. Pour in melted butter and stir until fully combined. Set aside.
  2. In a large bowl, Stir together chopped apples, granulated sugar, cornstarch, Shanky’s Whip Whisky®, cinnamon, and Kosher salt. Pour Apple filling into the 8” square baking pan and crumble topping over apples.
  3. Bake for approximately 40 minutes until apple filling is bubbling and crumble topping is beginning to brown. Cool slightly and serve warm, but not hot.

Farmhouse Pumpkin Bread with Maple Cream Cheese Frosting

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A loaf of pumpkin bread with two slices cut

TODAY’S MUSINGS:

My parents allowed me to make my own choice regarding belief – and I landed on atheism at an early age – about 4th grade.  I dabbled a little with Buddhism as a young adult (which Buddhists would say is not a religion), and came back to atheism – agnosticism if I’m honest.  I’m not afraid to say I DON’T KNOW.

There’s a difference between atheists who are allowed to find their way there at a young age versus the ones who had to fight tooth and nail to escape from a culture or family of religion, be it Christianity or another.  Those people tend to be loud, proud, and ready to fight any theist. 

Someone the other day mentioned that he was shocked – shocked – when a good friend of his asked him if he was a believer and, when he said “no,” the Christian walked away from him. “How dare a believer not give me respect for being a nonbeliever,” he complained.  Here’s the thing…he didn’t show respect for the believer either.

He did not just answer “no,”  he went on to say, “I don’t believe in Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny either.” This is an atheist maxim I’ve heard before. Is he truly surprised that the Christian was offended and walked away?  Rather than just saying, “I think differently than you,”  he had to take it up a notch by making fun of the theist’s beliefs, the foundation on which this person built their life, a core tenet of their very existence. Why the need to take it to that level? 

As an atheist,  strong in his  own belief,  couldn’t he have just said,  “No, I am not a believer,” or “No, I believe in science.”  Why the need to make the other person feel mocked? Yes, mocked, that’s the word. If this person was truly a “good friend,” why mock them for something they deem important in their life?

Just like when parents ask me, “didn’t you want to have kids?”  rather than responding,  “No, I don’t like unruly, loud, filthy, monkey-humans,”  I just answer “no” or “children are not for me,” which states my choice clearly but doesn’t mock another’s decision. 

Had he been a little more empathetic to another’s belief,  I’m less inclined to think the theist would have walked away. 

Today’s Recipe:

Farmhouse Pumpkin Bread with Maple Cream Cheese Frosting

Indulge in the comforting flavors of fall with this Farmhouse Pumpkin Bread recipe. This moist and aromatic bread is infused with rich pumpkin and warming spices, making it the perfect seasonal treat for cozy mornings, after-school snack or gatherings with loved ones.


Ingredients

    Pumpkin Bread
  • ⅓ cup milk
  • 1 teaspoon white or apple cider vinegar
  • 1 ¾ cup all-purpose flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon kosher salt
  • 1 teaspoon cinnamon
  • ½ teaspoon nutmeg
  • ½ teaspoon ginger
  • 1 ½ cups sugar
  • 1 cup pumpkin puree (not pumpkin pie filling)
  • 2 large eggs
  • ½ cup vegetable oil
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
    • Maple Cream Cheese Frosting (optional)
  • 4 oz. cream cheese (chilled)
  • ¼ cup (½ stick) unsalted butter (room temperature)
  • 2 Tablespoons maple syrup
  • 2 Tablespoons candied walnuts, chopped

Directions

  1. Preheat oven to 350⁰ F. Grease and flour a loaf pan. In a small bowl, combine milk and vinegar; set aside.
  2. In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, baking soda, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg, and ginger.
  3. In a large bowl, whisk together sugar, pumpkin, eggs, vegetable oil, vanilla, and milk. Stir the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients just until no lumps of flour remain.
  4. Pour batter into the loaf pan. Bake 60-70 minutes or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out with just a few moist crumbs. If the top of your bread is browning too quickly, cover with a piece of foil. Cool and enjoy.
  5. If you are making the frosting, Beat together cream cheese, butter, and maple syrup until light and fluffy. Make sure your bread is completely cool before swirling with frosting and decorating with candied walnuts.

3-Ingredient Peanut Butter Mousse

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Two peanut butter mousee parfaits with spoons and scattered chocolate

TODAY’S MUSINGS:
As a child, I believed a prominently placed “no soliciting” sign was a sure indication that a crotchety, reclusive homeowner lived there – the same neighbor that would yell at us to, “get off the grass!”  When faced with that sign, I would reconsider pressing the doorbell.  It seems, now that I am older, I am a card-carrying member of that same cantankerous category. 

As someone who works from home, I am exasperated by salespeople who attempt to sell me solar panels by ringing my doorbell on Monday at 10:00 a.m.– as if I have been sitting around, staring at the walls, just waiting for a visitor.  Even more annoying are the interruptions during my days off.  Fervently typing away in my writer’s retreat, I’m compelled, at the obnoxious dinging of my bell, to stop mid-thought, exit the retreat, stride across the backyard and through the house. When I crack the door, there stands a dreaded salesperson on the other side assuring me they are, “not trying to sell me anything.”  I’m reminded of Coleridge’s Person from Porlock.  Rather than a direct and simple “no soliciting” sign, I’m tempted to post this excessively verbose rebuke below:

Dear Stranger Ringing My Doorbell NOT Trying to Sell Something:

If I open the door, and you compliment my “lovely” home or anything else within your sightline…you ARE trying to sell me something.

If you mention some fictitious “problem” in the neighborhood – unreadable curb numbers, the rising cost of electricity, the work that has been going on to add more AT&T Fiber cables, home security, the proliferation of black widow spiders – you ARE trying to sell me something.

If you glance at your clipboard and mention a random neighbor’s name who agreed to sign up for whatever it is you are not selling, then you ARE trying to sell me something.  I know many neighbors – and why is it you never list a neighbor who I actually know? 

I understand that you are just trying to earn a little cash.  However, this is my HOME and you have NOT been invited to my doorstep.  If I am here, I am most likely working, cooking, writing, napping, or watching a show on Netflix.  NONE of these situations are improved by an interruption from you.   

Further, even if I DID want to switch my Wi-Fi carrier, door-to-door sales is not the method I would choose.  I would go online and order it – after extensive Yelping and Googling.  I would never TRUST that your product or service is of quality and reasonably priced. If a company is using door-to-door as part of their advertising campaign, then something is shady with the advertiser.

The only item I would ever purchase from someone going door-to-door is GIRL SCOUT COOKIES – so, if you’re not selling those, then please save us both the hassle and MOVE ON.  Thank you.

Too Much?

TODAY’S RECIPE:
I adore peanut butter and I’m not above scooping a large blob from the jar and licking it directly off the spoon, but this is even better. This fluffy peanut butter mousse recipe can be thrown together in a flash and yet still satisfies the biggest peanut butter fan’s craving.  Full confession – the photo shows two precisely piped and decorated peanut butter mousse parfaits – in truth, I usually scoop the mousse from mixing bowl directly into my mouth. No fancy parfait glass needed.

3-INGREDIENT PEANUT BUTTER MOUSSE

  • Servings: 2 small servings
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For peanut butter lovers only. This 5-minute dessert is an upgrade from eating PB out of the jar with a spoon.


Ingredients

  • ½ cup whipping cream
  • ¼ cup (generous) peanut butter
  • 3 Tablespoons powdered sugar

Directions

  1. In a medium size bowl, using beaters, beat all ingredients until fully combined and the texture of a fluffy mousse. Optional: sprinkle with chocolate shavings or flaky sea salt, such as Maldon. Serve in dessert glasses or eat directly from the bowl – I won’t tell.

Rice Pudding Tart with Rum Raisins

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A rice pudding tart with a piece removed

Today’s Musings:
The other day, I accidentally stumbled upon a photo of an ex-boyfriend. Fucking Facebook. My heart immediately jumped into my throat, my nerves felt jittery and I got a little flushed. “What the heck is this? Why is my body reacting this way?” I wondered.

I extricated myself from this man’s web years ago, processed the damage, recognized the situation for the disaster it was, and moved on. I dealt with that shit.  Today, I don’t care what he’s doing, nor do I care who he is doing it with, or where he’s doing it.

My reaction on seeing his image, made me wonder, “Am I harboring some sort of unprocessed emotion? What the fuck is going on?”

It seems this is an automatic response from my body and entirely normal. It doesn’t matter what my head tells me, my body is going to do its own damn thing.  This reaction is my fight or flight response. It is the same response I would experience if I came face to face with a lion. My autonomic nervous system’s way of telling me, “Danger, bad situation ahead!”  Even though it was just a photo, my body was saying, “Girl, you do not want to go there!”

So, my reaction was automatic and nothing I can influence.  My shit with him is processed, I am in my right mind, and my body is just doing its job.

If this ever happens to you, just acknowledge it and then let it go, which is exactly what I’ll do next time – rather than Googling the feeling to see what it was, ruminating on the fight or flight response and relationships, and writing this damn blog post about it.

However, now at least I know I cannot control what my body does in this situation. I can only control my reaction to it, and that reaction should be to acknowledge it, keep scrolling, and then…Let. That. Shit. Go.

Today’s Recipe:

Rice Pudding Tart with Rum Raisins

  • Servings: One 9” Tart
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Creamy, cinnamon-scented rice pudding dotted with rum-soaked raisins encased in a sugary cookie crust.


Ingredients

  • 1 cup uncooked Basmati rice
  • 1 ⅓ cup all-purpose flour
  • 5 Tablespoons sugar
  • ½ teaspoon salt
  • ½ cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, melted
  • ½ cup (scant) golden raisins
  • 1 Tablespoon dark rum
  • ½ cup sugar
  • 2 Tablespoons (generous) cornstarch
  • ¾ teaspoon cinnamon, plus more for dusting
  • ¼ teaspoon salt
  • 2 large eggs, well-beaten
  • 2 cups whole milk
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • Sweetened whipped cream

Directions

  1. Make Rice: Rinse rice and place in a small saucepan with two cups water. Bring to boil, reduce heat, cover and simmer for about 15 minutes until tender. Set aside rice in a bowl to cool.
  2. Make Rum Raisins: In a small bowl, combine golden raisins and rum. Heat in a microwave for one minute, stirring once. Set aside.
  3. Make Crust: Preheat oven to 350°. In a medium bowl, combine flour, sugar, salt, and melted butter. Pat dough on the bottom and up the sides of a 9” tart pan. Bake about 25 minutes until golden. Remove from oven and cool.
  4. Make Rice Pudding: In a medium saucepan, whisk together sugar, corn starch, cinnamon, and salt. Whisk in egg until no cornstarch can be seen. Add milk then cooked and cooled rice.
  5. Place saucepan on medium heat and bring to a simmer, whisking constantly. Simmer until pudding is very thick, similar to the texture of thick oatmeal. Take saucepan off heat and stir in rum-soaked raisins and vanilla extract.
  6. Scoop rice pudding into pie crust and cover with plastic wrap, ensuring the plastic wrap makes contact with the pudding surface to avoid a skin. Chill at least two hours. Decorate with sweetened whipped cream and dust with cinnamon. Let tart stand at room temperature for about 15 minutes before serving.

Carrot Cupcakes with Vanilla Bean Cream Cheese Frosting

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A plate of carrot cupcakes with carrot decorations and a cup of tea

Today’s Musings:
During my online dating years, I’d roll my eyes at the triteness of profiles that claimed, “I’m as comfortable in jeans and a t-shirt as I am in a suit and tie,” as if that sentence proclaims, “I’m a tangle of contradictions.”   All that tells me is you’re not a stuffy elitist or backwater hillbilly.

 In my relationships, I often feel the other person doesn’t see me as I truly am, but rather they narrowly define me as they want me to be.  But, then again, why should they – I am a kaleidoscope of contradictions, turn me one way and see one thing, turn me another and other colors and patterns emerge.  I am a human Rorschach test – what do you see? 

Staring at my fingertips, I delight in my dirt manicures from Sunday gardening as much as my freshly painted digits on Monday.  I deftly tick off each item on my long to-do list in the morning and lie, sloth-like, on the couch binge-watching Better Call Saul in the evening.  After a recent camping trip with Mr. M, friends and siblings said, “you must really like him,” as if I’m only comfortable enrobed in the luxe of a Ritz Carlton. I’m horrified that I can walk through the streets of my neighborhood noticing the details – the scent of orange blossoms, the buzz of a hummingbird, the fluffy tail of a squirrel and simultaneously walk blindly past the homeless woman sitting on the curb.  My irreverent words can end long-held friendships, my posts ignite family controversy, yet I yearn to be proper and not ruffle a feather.  I sign up for every Meetup, my social calendar bulging at the seams, while an afternoon of quiet solitude at home with my phone switched to silent mode restores me. The suburbs have never fulfilled me, yet I’ve spent more than half my life with green lawns and welcome mats.  I desire acreage, a forest filled with birdsong, a nearby stream where I can dip my feet, with a Michelin-starred chef around the corner, a music venue that books the newest bands, and a museum showing the Egon Schiele retrospective, an impossible amalgamation. I’m blissfully happy driving the winding roads of an unfamiliar country and just as content steering through the curves of a good bit of fiction, ensconced at home, my two cats curled up and sleeping contently beside me.  I am level headed and calm and I am emotional and irrational.  I can be as competent as I am unsure and clueless. I am both intrepid warrior and fair maiden in equal measure.

I am an inkblot of contradictions.

Today’s Recipe:
When I worked at the steakhouse, chef nixed my suggestion to offer carrot cake on our dessert menu. He claimed carrot cake was too divisive – carrot cake lovers have strong beliefs when it comes to the proper ingredients…nuts or no nuts, raisins or no raisins, and, if raisins are allowed, black or golden raisins.  The carrot cake debate, in his mind, was as impassioned as “does pineapple belong on pizza?”

If given the chance, I would have served the recipe below, which, for this baker who usually gilds the lily, is surprisingly straightforward.  No nuts, no raisins, – and just a bit of pineapple for flair.  I like pineapple on my pizza – and in my carrot cake, too.  Served with cream cheese frosting, it ticks all the boxes.


My Favorite Carrot Cupcakes with Vanilla Bean Cream Cheese Frosting

  • Servings: One Dozen Cupcakes
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This is my go-to carrot cupcake recipe – the secret ingredient in this moist version is a bit of pineapple.


Ingredients

    Cupcakes
  • 1 cup all-purpose flour
  • ¾ teaspoon baking powder
  • ¾ teaspoon baking soda
  • ½ teaspoon salt
  • ½ teaspoon (generous) cinnamon
  • ¼ teaspoon (generous) ginger
  • ¼ teaspoon (generous) allspice
  • 1 cup sugar
  • ¾ cup vegetable oil
  • 2 Large eggs
  • 1 ½ cups grated peeled carrots
  • ¼ cup drained crushed pineapple
    • Frosting
  • 8 oz. cream cheese, well chilled
  • ¼ cup unsalted butter, softened
  • 2 cups confectioner’s sugar
  • ½ vanilla bean, scraped

Directions

  1. Preheat oven to 350° F. Line 12 muffin tins with paper baking cups.
  2. Sift first 7 ingredients into a medium bowl. Beat together sugar, oil, and eggs in a large bowl for about 2 minutes. Add dry ingredients to egg mixture in two additions, beating until just blended after each addition. Stir in carrots and pineapple.
  3. Spoon batter into muffin cups. Bake about 25 minutes until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Cool.
  4. To make frosting, beat chilled cream cheese and softened butter 2 minutes. Add confectioner’s sugar and vanilla bean. Beat on low 30 seconds until fully combined. Continue beating on high for 3 minutes until light and fluffy.