…And the radio is in the hands of such a lot of fools tryin’ to anaesthetize the way that you feel…

                                                – Elvis Costello  

Do you have a radio station that entirely meets your needs; one that holds you beguiled such that other stations are unnecessary? 

Driving to work this morning, I resigned myself to my radio’s “seek” button when nothing piqued my interest on any of my five pre-programmed stations. There’s only five because no other station is worth the bother of programming.  While the dial churned, my mind began to percolate as well, pondering the parallels between the finite number of desirable partners in my town and the dearth of good radio stations.  Strange how my mind works sometimes. 

There must be hundreds of stations, so why is it difficult to find a good one?  The first choice I’m faced with – AM vs. FM.  Is there anything on AM besides Republicans, sportscasters and oldies?  AM is out.  Of the remaining FM stations, I’m eliminating any that aren’t in English.  Communication is essential. Cross out boot and bolo-tie wearing Country, Long-haired rockers and hip-hop rap gangsters with the belts below their ass. Disregard Christian and religious stations (If you’re a frequent reader of this blog, you know why). Forget about smooth jazz and all of it’s impotence, but other jazz can stay.  College stations – love them, but do they love me?  I’m not their target audience.  I DO enjoy a good dose of NPR, classical and jazz…but not every day and not all the time.  So what’s left?  Those generalized, insipid mainstream radio stations that play an occasional good song amid the drivel of commercials, Kings of Leon, Dave Mathews and other such slop. 

And so, I remain single and listen to CD’s because I can’t stay content for long with insipid mainstream slop. Change the station, please.